Tuesday, 6 November 2012

Three Wives and counting

***NBA fantasy league update: I am #1 in the standings***

Mom has arrived.
She's got some sweet suitcases.
I haven't seen mom in over 3 months so it's pretty cool that her face is here now. Makes me feel closer to home. I envision many nights of skyping with dad; he's gone all high-tech on us and created his own account. Even put his smiling mug on there.

Sunday night us Carver girls got down to business and settled in for a very serious game of Sequence. This is what happens when the three of us play games:

I refuse to post the results; as they are of no consequence.

Monday was mom's physio initiation. We went via Wheel Trans and the driver managed to question me on absolutely everything; said I didn't book an escort and that I put down wheelchair. I advised him that I did in fact book an escort and that I chose "cane" as my assistive device (which is actually Squeaker). After he checked his book he concurred.

Somebody needs to tell him that I'm always right. 

I managed to remember to introduce her to most people and gave her an overview of her job. She caught on quickly and was very responsive to my bossing her around. I'm sure that will change with time. Hey, gotta take advantage, right?

After physio we hit up the Eaton Centre one last time for the lil sis. What is it with my family and friends trying to off me? Mom hadn't been here 24 hours yet, but managed to try to kill me once by attempting to dump me out at the curb. Pay back mother! There's a nursing home with your name on it.

Have I mentioned how sweet Jamie is? She bought me a cool mug, with a double meaning, and spent 3 years inside Forever 21, while I wondered if my grey had all grown out. Turns out she was getting me the exact same pair of jeans she had gotten earlier; jeans that I fell in love with.

I have to figure out a way to keep her here. I was thinking of keeping her in the closet and bringing her out when I needed her to make me a coffee or fend off the paparazzi. However, I would feed her. Cause to not, would be cruel.

Today, Jamie was Carman's babysitter at physio, while mom looked after me. Carman was ecstatic; he figured he'd have it easy....and he did:

She even strapped on his leg weights for him...and they say I'm a princess.
Carman is quite the ladies man. He now refers to Jamie as wife #3. Wife #2 (Chaitra, the sister of our transplant buddy Shilpa) showed up during physio, so I decided to capture the moment:

But where's the actual Mrs. Hamilton?
I've told Carman that he's soon going to get his own show. Perhaps we'll use this shoot in the opening:

Here she is thinking, "Please ladies, take him!"
After I wore out all the equipment in the room with my amazingness, I popped in on Pat, my friend who received the single lung from my false call. The first words out of my mouth were "Lung thief!!"

She looked great, is doing fantastic and is hoping to be out by Friday. It was so awesome to see her and know that she's doing so well. Now I can send her out with her good lungs to look for a set for me. Pound the pavement, look under rocks and up trees. Stuff like that.

Before we left the hospital we spent some time with a fellow transplantee's family (she is recovering from her double lung transplant and is in the ICU). She is a pretty amazing woman and is such a little fighter. She makes us all proud. Can't wait until she's up and running and kicking arse in physio.

While hanging out with my friend Chai, I discovered that she has pretty cool kicks too. Notice the reaching hand:

Evidence that there is always someone after my red kicks.


  1. Haven't got my copies of those pics yet...just sayin' Chicklet...

  2. #1 in the NBA, way to go Jessica. Read em and weap Jason. Love you, Linda D.

  3. Jessica!! Love your blogs and love your spirit. You better get better and get your lazy ass to one of my shows when I come out there. If you don't, the c-word is gonna fly! Love you, mama, and keep up the great work! XO Lisa Lampanelli

    1. Lisa Freakin' Lampanelli!!!!

      I'm pretty sure that seeing your name made my lungs start to magically heal themselves. Except I may have hyperventilated a bit and blew up all that progress.

      I'm also pretty sure that you and I could be best friends, so that's what we'll do ok?

      Also, I love you. I've decided that since Donald doesn't want you as his apprentice, that you can be mine. I'll take you to physio and let you at all the crusty lung'd, lazy ass, post transplant wannabees.

      I'm sure your people will contact my people. Excuse me, I have to go wait by the phone...